SILENCE THE NOISE OF OTHERS; LISTEN TO YOUR OWN VOICE.
Should’ve, could’ve, would’ve, ought to – words that always preceded advice from folks who felt they knew better than we did concerning subjects ranging from career choices to marriage prospects to church affiliations. They always knew better, did they not?
How long did you tolerate this type of badgering and bullying? I turned a deaf ear early in life, but unfortunately, I had no better options than those offered to me by others. Before me lay a long road of self-abuse during which I would have done well to listen to family and friends. In those years I was the epitome of ‘self-will run riot’ and I know today as an old man that Larry Brown, the young man, had serious emotional deficits and character defects. Some people will say, “yeah, Larry, when are you going to get better, you’re still whacko?”
“I can’t hear you. That’s right, I won’t be listening anymore to your should have, could have, would have and ought to and I am not accepting your inventory of me.”
I began to heal when I trusted the inner voice more than the outside noise. People, especially friends and family, learned that I no longer put their theories and perspectives before my own gut and conscience because I had learned to validate myself and the Higher Power of my understanding. We have been an awesome team facing life on life’s terms. It’s a love affair unlike any other realized on my journey’s path.
I humbly accept the available mercy and grace quietly with gratitude. I speak, not with braggadocio, but under an awe which transcends human words and understanding. Millions of fellow sufferers have traveled this same road knowing that it is not an earned reward for sober-living, but a gift freely given. It is the essence of amazing grace unleashed on a wretch like me.